Things I Hate

-When old people blow their noses. They can't just blow their nose, they have to dig deep into their nostrils, like they are hoping to pull out some brain matter. Face the fact: you're picking your nose in public. The addition of a tissue doesn't make it acceptable. Then, after all that disgusting blowing and picking, they put the tissue BACK INTO THEIR POCKET. What the hell are you going to do with it? You've destroyed it beyond recognition. Why are you keeping it?

-Reruns of "The Nanny."

-Fat girls who wear tiny, midriff-exposing shirts. Their bellies hang over their jeans, their torsos look like candles with fat wax dripping all over their pants.

-The flimsy cone cups at water coolers.

-The PAX television network